Oh-Oh! VH1 Counts Down the “Greatest Songs of the 00’s”

 

Too soon? Apparently not for VH1, which begins counting down their take on the “100 Greatest Songs of the 00’s tonight at 10/9 Central. They’ll be running down 20 songs a night through Friday, beginning with #100-80 tonight.

Whether you call them the Aughts, the Oh-Oh’s (or Oh-Oh!s) or the Decade of Despair, there’s one thing that’s for damn sure – any list of the greatest music of the decade is subjective at best, misguided at worst. Judging from the list, VH1 let some chaff in with the wheat. Either way, I’ll be watching, probably with one hand on the remote, one hand on the iTunes purchase button (“Oh em gee, I totally forgot about that song!”).

I really don’t know who decides these things, but there’s some foolishness happening on this list. If you don’t mind spoilers, let’s take a little glance, shall we? (The full list is at the end for your reading pleasure/walk down memory lane/utter frustration.)

The Best (according to VH1)

For sheer cultural impact, it’s really tough to argue with this top ten, especially Queen B occupying her usual perch at the top (watch that throne, Kanye) with her solo career-making “Crazy in Love” collab with hubby and daddy-to-be Jay-Z. But “Poker Face” at #3? “Bad Romance” thumps circles around “Poker Face” and was a far bigger and better song for Gaga. And “In Da Club” in the top ten? I don’t think so. Overall, judging from the top ten, any visitor from another planet would think we spent the entire decade shaking what our mamas gave us, only occasionally pausing to forlornly beg our ex that, yes indeed, “We Belong Together. – which, by the way, is the only ballad in the top ten – and the best choice for one. There really was no bigger slow jam in the Oh-Oh!s.

The Rest

“Bootylicious” should have been booted for “Say My Name” – the far better Destiny’s Child song. And I’d argue for Madonna getting another entry on the list for “Hung Up,” in addition to her #28 entry for “Music.” Honestly, it’s obvious from this list that, for VH1, when it comes to “greatest,” cultural impact trumps musicality. I dig the majority of the songs on this list, but 90 percent of the time, they’re not the best songs from the artist. “Daughters” for John Mayer? Lovely song, but no. Chris Brown’s “Run It!” has no business on this list or any other. It’s not the best of anything, nor is it the worst of anything. I can spout off 10 club bangers off the top of my head that were more memorable.

They got it right with Britney. On “Toxic” and “Oops…I Did It Again,” she is on her most irresistible ear candy high. And if you’re going to invite Natasha Bedingfield to the party, how does “Pocketful of Sunshine” trump “Unwritten?” I’d argue for The Killers’ “Mr. Brightside” being higher and for Creed’s “With Arms Wide Open” to just be dropped from the list completely. Creed would look out of place on a top 200. Also, Nickelback is dismissed.

The walk down bumpin’ memory lane is pleasantly littered with “oh-yeah-I-love-that-one” jams like “Try Again” from Aaliyah, “Get Ur Freak On,” from Missy Elliott, and “I’m Real” from “J to tha L-O” and Ja Rule. (Oh, hi there Macy Gray at #85!).

We’re loving “Clocks” as the Coldplay representative, but why is “Cry Me A River” from JT so low at #59? Ahh, Culture Poppers, every question opens the door to more questions…

What do you think is missing from the list? What do you think should have been dropped?

1. Beyonce featuring Jay-Z, “Crazy in Love”

2. OutKast, “Hey Ya!”

3. Lady Gaga, “Poker Face”

4. Eminem, “Lose Yourself”

5. Kelly Clarkson, “Since U Been Gone”

6. Kanye West featuring Jamie Foxx, “Gold Digger”

7. Justin Timberlake featuring Timbaland, “SexyBack”

8. Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys, “Empire State of Mind”

9. Mariah Carey, “We Belong Together”

10. 50 Cent, “In Da Club”

11. Rihanna featuring Jay-Z, “Umbrella”

12. Black Eyed Peas, “I Gotta Feeling”

13. Green Day, “American Idiot”

14. Gnarls Barkley, “Crazy”

15. U2 , “Beautiful Day”

16. Beyoncé, “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)”

17. Coldplay, “Clocks”

18. Christina Aguilera, “Beautiful”

19. Destiny’s Child, “Bootylicious”

20. Britney Spears, “Toxic”

21.J ay-Z , “99 Problems”

22. Alicia Keys, “Fallin’”

23. P!nk, “Get the Party Started”

24. Missy Elliott, “Get Ur Freak On”

25. Nelly, “Hot in Here”

26. The White Stripes, “Seven Nation Army”

27. Usher featuring Lil Jon and Ludacris, “Yeah!”

28. Madonna, “Music”

29. Foo Fighters, “The Best of You”

30. Gwen Stefani, “Hollaback Girl”

31. Amy Winehouse, “Rehab”

32. Maroon 5, “This Love”

33. Johnny Cash, “Hurt “

34. Janet Jackson, “All For You”

35. John Mayer, “Daughters”

36. *NSYNC, “Bye Bye Bye”

37. Britney Spears, “Oops!…I Did It Again”

38. Miley Cyrus, “Party in the U.S.A.”

39. Adele, “Chasing Pavements “

40. Fall Out Boy, “Sugar, We’re Going Down”

41. R. Kelly, “Trapped in the Closet”

42. Train, “Drops of Jupiter (Tell Me)”

43. Katy Perry, “I Kissed a Girl”

44. Red Hot Chili Peppers, “Californication”

45. Eve featuring Gwen Stefani, “Let Me Blow Ya Mind”

46. Kid Rock & Sheryl Crow, “Picture”

47. Christina, Lil’ Kim, Mya, Pink, “Lady Marmalade”

48. Kings of Leon, “Sex On Fire”

49. Lady Gaga, “Bad Romance”

50. Taylor Swift, “You Belong With Me”

51. Natasha Bedingfield, “Pocketful of Sunshine”

52. Shakira feautring Wyclef, “Hips Don’t Lie”

53. Blink-182, “All the Small Things “

54. Norah Jones, “Don’t Know Why”

55. The Killers, “Mr. Brightside”

56. DMX, “Party Up (Up In Here)”

57. Mary J. Blige, “Family Affair”

58. Jason Mraz, “I’m Yours”

59. Justin Timberlake, “Cry Me a River”

60. Ke$ha, “Tik Tok”

61. Kelis, “Milkshake”

62. Avril Lavigne, “Complicated”

63. Andrew W.K., “Party Hard”

64. Jennifer Lopez featuring Ja Rule, “I’m Real (Murder Remix)”

65. Aaliyah, “Try Again”

66. Snoop Dogg featuring Pharrell, “Drop It Like It’s Hot”

67. Leona Lewis, “Bleeding Love”

68. Ludacris featuring Shawnna, “Stand Up”

69. Evanescence, “Bring Me to Life”

70. Chris Brown featuring Juelz Santana, “Run It!”

71.  Colbie Caillat, “Bubbly”

72. Jet, “Are You Gonna Be My Girl”

73. Nelly Furtado featuring Timbaland, “Promiscuous”

74. Chamillionaire featuring Krayzie Bone, “Ridin’”

75. Gavin Degraw, “I Don’t Want to Be”

76. T.I. featuring Rihanna, “Live Your Life”

77. Nickleback, “How You Remind Me”

78. Plain White T’s, “Hey There Delilah”

79. Enrique Iglesias, “Hero”

80. Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz featuring Ying Yang Twins, “Get Low”

81. Bruce Springsteen, “The Rising”

82. Matchbox Twenty, “Unwell”

83. D’Angelo, “(Untitled) How Does It Feel”

84. Linkin Park, “In the End”

85. Macy Gray, “I Try”

86. Aerosmith, “Jaded”

87. The Darkness, “I Believe in a Thing Called Love”

88. Fountains of Wayne, “Stacy’s Mom”

89. M.I.A., “Paper Planes”

90. Mystikal, “Shake Ya Ass”

91. Creed, “With Arms Wide Open”

92. Flo Rida featuring T-Pain, “Low”

93. Ok Go, “Here It Goes Again”

94. Daughtry, “It’s Not Over”

95. James Blunt, “You’re Beautiful”

96. Pussycat Dolls featuring Busta Rhymes, “Don’t Cha”

97. Shaggy, “It Wasn’t Me”

98. 3 Doors Down, “Kryptonite”

99. Carrie Underwood, “Before He Cheats”

100. Sisqò, “Thong Song”

 

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One thought on “Oh-Oh! VH1 Counts Down the “Greatest Songs of the 00’s”

  1. This list is just weird. 59 does seem really low for “Cry Me a River” (I will NEVER get tired of listening to that song) and I love Coldplay’s “Clocks” but what about “Yellow”?!

    Also, I just heard “Run It” FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER (thanks to pop up video) and it absolutely shouldn’t be on this list.

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